Lazy Sunday Post: I am Machingunsaur!

The Lazy Sunday Post, as I'm sure you've all picked up on, largely exists so that I can reveal the inner machinations of my mind without having to put the kind of effort in an actual post would take. I truly enjoy it as a segment in which I can throw professionalism out the window... well more than usual, I mean. This place has a largely shameless degree of unprofessionalism (shut up Google spell check that is a word), but the Lazy Sunday post is so shameless it actually crosses over into whatever the opposite of shame is. I'm aware shame has an actual antonym, and I just remembered what it is, but I refuse to type it out of principle.

Anyway, Lazy Sunday post is lazy. Big shocker there. Let's move on to what I actually came here to talk about.

Sometimes, when I'm incredibly bored or just experiencing some sort of ADHD episode, I suddenly stop whatever I'm currently doing on my computer, open a new tab, and Google the first thing that pops into my head. For no reason, usually. Though I will take a second to say googling the phrase "laser vision" yields incredibly underwhelming results. Get on that Google.

And if there's one thing I've learned, it's that with seven billion people on the planet, there are no original thoughts anymore. Once, attempting to google something no one had googled before, I typed "squirrel is batman".

This is ONE of the results. ONE.

Do you see the power of raw numbers? Statistically speaking, with seven billion people on the planet Earth, the odds of me thinking up something no one has thought up before are literally impossible.

OR ARE THEY?

For you see, ladies and gentlemen, I have had... AN ORIGINAL THOUGHT!

Or at least, original enough that when I googled it, I got zero results, a feat usually only achievable by toddlers and cats. That thought?

"I AM MACHINGUNSAR!!!" (Trio of exclamation points not used in search.)

This was a phrase I would often belt out, exhausted, after a hard days training. Training that usually involved running many, many miles at speeds which would make the jaws of mortal men touch the floor beneath the feet of those very same mortal men. It's a stupid phrase, but it's my stupid phrase, and it's always been a very empowering one for me.

So yeah, the Internet, just remember that even if you finally catch up and popularize Machingunsaur as a gun totting, mother f*cking T-Rex, or a dinosaur with machineguns mounted on the back of its machine gun hands with machine guns for teeth so that its machine guns can machine gun while it machine guns... I thought of it first.